Thanksgiving – A Celebration That We Can All Share and Lessons for us all to Learn

What follows is a brief reflection I shared at our recently held community-wide Interfaith Thanksgiving Celebration. This was a gathering of celebration, exactly the type I long for when we gather for something somber as we did several weeks ago. I have been asked by several people if I would share this on my blog so here it is. The celebration was held at St. Peter’s Episcopal Church in Glenside, Pennsylvania and coordinated by its wonderful Pastor, Emily Richards. Jews, Muslims, Christians, and adherents of other religious traditions all gathered together as people of faith and as Americans.

About three and a half weeks ago, we had a huge community gathering at Reform Congregation Keneseth Israel where people of all faiths came together to support the Jewish community as we mourned the loss of members of our larger faith community in a violent incident in Pittsburgh. I remember feeling so thankful for this outpouring of love, concern and support from my friends in faith, all faiths. I wrote in my blog that week about how I so appreciate how we help each other through challenges and that I would hope we could join hands and hearts in celebration as well. And here we are doing just that. For that I am thankful.

I am thankful to be living in this country and freely practicing my faith as we all, in this beautiful sanctuary of faith, are doing. We would like to think that this freedom is fundamental to our identity as Americans; that we, as the children of Israel so long ago in the text that Rabbi Berkowitz just read, came to our covenanted union with certain understandings of our practices and our responsibilities to be contributing and appropriate members of the society that we would build together. As we all know, while this idealized notion feels good, this is not the entire story. In our lives today, we are constantly reminded of the vulnerability of that freedom to be, that we all cherish and often take for granted, as we remember and share our concern for those whose freedom to be is being threatened.

We in the Jewish community are taught to remember Amalek and to never forget that this nation took advantage of our most vulnerable members. One of the more controversial teachings, for some, is the clear injunction to destroy Amalek for doing so, for not acknowledging strength or integrity, but for fighting those least able to defend ourselves. Many of our Jewish commentators explain that we are to not only destroy the Amalek that takes advantage of others outside of ourselves, but inside of ourselves as well. We as Israelites came to the land promised to us long ago as tenders of the soil, protectors of the land and each other, and as those required to take care of and welcome all those who come to us as strangers, but stay as members of our family, so to speak. This was the idea of the Native Americans so long ago when they too welcomed the other and shared the land and their resources with them. It is this lesson of caring for all those around us and not taking advantage of vulnerabilities that we are to remember and to practice when we are the best we can be. Doing so is fundamental to keeping the commandments God gave to us then, and to our covenant with each other, and what it asks from us now.

We cannot acknowledge and be thankful for our blessings without showing concern for those for whom these very basic elements of a life well lived may be denied or threatened. As there was affliction long ago in the reading from Deuteronomy, we are witnessing the same in our world today. For those of us who are able to be thankful for the blessings bestowed upon us, we hope that we are worthy and that we are properly sharing and caring with our resources as the commanded action of doing Tzedakah asks of us. Many experts tell us that there should not be hunger in our world today, we have technology to clean water and provide healthy environments for so many who do not have these most basic necessities, and with responsible choices, we can use our many financial and material resources to better the lives of so many. All of our religious traditions and our foundational texts tell us to do just this and chastise us when we don’t.

Yes, I am thankful for this assemblage. I am thankful that I can practice the faith in which I believe. I am thankful that we, people of different faiths can come together to celebrate what we share and recognize fully and respect where we differ. And I am thankful for the many blessings God, in Infinite Compassion, has bestowed upon us. Let us behave responsibly with these blessings and the quality of life they enable. My prayer is that for all of us who have come together in fellowship and as people of faith reach out to those who cannot be here and gently remind all of us of our humanity, our need for each other, and how we are indeed to show our gratitude by extending our hand to those around us. Then, with God’s help, we will show ourselves to merit these blessings for which we are so thankful.

And now for a footnote: This past weekend, our entire family gathered together and as is usual for us, we talked about important and relevant issues in our lives. It is always such a treat for me to gather with all of our children, their partners in life and the next generation, our eldest daughter’s four adorable girls. I am always touched by how they each continue to exude the values we all hold so dear in their professional as well as personal lives. Each of them does continue to extend their hand to others, to care about all people and to truly try to make this world a better place. For this too, I am eternally and boundlessly thankful. When people often worry about our next generation, look carefully. There are indeed many wonderful things that are happening due to the efforts of these younger adults who are caring more, doing so much and addressing many of our challenges. I pray that they will continue to do so for many years to come as well as show those who have forgotten how to work together with all people, both those similar to and those different from them, exactly how to do so and the benefit that accrues from such cooperation and sharing.

Here we are, acts threatening our humanity continue, and now what?

In the past few weeks, there have been letter bombs, several mass murders, individual acts of violence and hatred also ending lives that should still be lived, and of course the 24/7 barrage of words of vengeance and hatred that make me think we should all just stop talking. It really does get to be too much. And yet…. Such beautiful moments of resilience and hope.

This past Sunday twenty-two people came together across lines of faith – Jews, various iterations of Christians, Muslims, and wonderful resources in our larger community to have a meaningful and substantive discussion on Immigration – the challenges that we know are acting as significant and difficult roadblocks and the voices of our respective faiths, telling us to make the “other” one of us, because we are all created in the image of God. These gatherings always bolster me and give me cause for hope that the hard work many of us are engaged in is with purpose and may actually achieve something meaningful. Representatives from HIAS, Peace Islands Institute, Cabrini University, and so many of our faith communities shared stories including our own past with members of our families coming to the USA for a better life, with few prospects and from countries that were less than desirable. Our gratitude that our relatives not so long ago took this chance and the United States responded affirmatively was not lost in that room. Then we had to interface that with real stories of today and people who are being threatened given the climate in this country – people who are making our country a better place through their hard work, foundational values and important legacies. As one of the people with whom I have ongoing contact said some time ago when we were discussing the present dilemma and I tried to gently remind that person that we ourselves were immigrants, “That was fifty or more years go and that was different.” No, I would comment, in our conversation, it is not different. In fact, consider that if the present climate was operative when YOUR family came to this country, would they have been let in? What is different – simply that once again to forget history is to repeat its mistakes, and there are now way too many people who have forgotten their past and refuse to use it to acknowledge our obligation to give others a future, as those who came before us did for us.

In one of my shul (synagogue) communities of which I am part, both of the past weeks were important ones of reflection, consideration of our present reality and a shared validation of what is truly important in our lives – with so many people of different faiths supporting us with their presence and expression of solidarity on Show Up For Shabbat, a report from one of our community’s Rabbis on his experience as a chaplain with the Red Cross in Pittsburgh to help guide that community through its crisis, a moving talk from the heart from one of our State Senators and our wonderful Rabbi who provided just the right healing community feeling we all needed. The bringing together of prayer, lessons of Torah and looking at our world with all of its flaws and finding hope in each other’s caring solidarity was another example of the best of who we can and should be. Knowing that this was the case in so many of our houses and communities of faith bolsters my spirit and encourages my soul.

Now, I am in the midst of working with a wonderful group of Christian, Muslim and Jewish clergy in planning a community wide Interfaith Thanksgiving Celebration. We will all come together as Americans who are free to practice the religions of our choice, a fundamental right guaranteed to us all, along with others that at present are being threatened. As Thanksgiving approaches with all of its attendant complexities and reframed meanings, the notion that we stop yet again and be thankful for our lives and many blessings seems to be something worth sharing and observing with other American communities of faith. It is my hope that as many people will make the point of showing up for these celebrations that will occur in many communities as they did a few weeks ago. It is critically important that we come together to celebrate to the same degree that we come together to mourn and support each other when needed.

Finally, this coming weekend I will be with one of my most cherished communities, a group of Orthodox Jewish parents of LGBT children. We will come together for prayer, community and sharing our stories with each other, while celebrating our children and their accomplishments and their lives. Once a year, we all gather while supporting each other in navigating the more religiously pitched communities in our lives and loving our children and advocating for them. I look forward to this gathering which is in its sixth year and am so aware of how much has changed in the past few years with more and more shuls/synagogues and schools and other institutions welcoming our LGBT children and other family members and friends.

Yes, there is much to celebrate and be thankful for in our lives. That being said, we cannot take these things for granted. We must always be aware of the need to continue to cherish what is important and to advocate for what is needed. It is when we stop looking to the sides and over our shoulder, insuring that everyone is safe, included and valued, that we as a society are most threatened. This Thanksgiving let us celebrate our many blessings and as we each approach our different winter celebrations, we should remember to honor each other’s narrative and consider what we can all learn from and with each other.

Once Again, Horror Brings Us Together - Respponding to Pittsburgh

Motzei Shabbat (Saturday night after our Sabbath observance) I went to reconnect to the world (as we stay completely unplugged during our Shabbatot/Sabbaths and Hagim/Holidays) and found a flurry of emails talking about the tragedy in Pittsburgh and the community response. Immediately my colleagues from various faith communities in the community in which I live had already been moving on all cylinders to make sure we had a place and service to gather for the following evening at 7:00 pm, less than 24 hours of my viewing these emails.

My assigned task as President of our Cheltenham Area Multi-Faith Council was to get the word out to as many people as possible in different communities of faith. We live in a celebrated and acknowledged community of diversity, not unlike Squirrel Hill and people feel safe in this diversity and acceptance as well as valuing of each other. The fact that Squirrel Hill is such a community makes this already horrific occurrence even more startling. Truly nowhere is safe if we ever were naïve to think otherwise. I quickly blasted the information for a service that had to yet be planned, which would be done the following day, to as many people in our Jewish world and in our larger world of communities of faith in Montgomery County, where we live.

After another flurry of emails and phone calls, it was clear that there would be a meeting to organize this even at 3:00 pm Sunday afternoon. I entered the room and there were Rabbis, Cantors, Pastors and Reverends from other faith communities and whoever could be reached “on the fly” with absolutely no lead time. In one hour, we had ourselves a plan. We then each went our ways to go over our parts and figure out how to bring it together and less than two hours later, reconvened to gather with whoever was reachable and could come.

We found sanctuary in our very large sanctuary that was truly filled to the brim – with Jews across the ideological spectrum, many Christians of various iterations, Muslims and people of other faiths from our community as well. We all came together to share words of healing, honor the lives of those who were snuffed out tragically, and to take comfort and bring comfort to each other. I have received such an overwhelming avalanche of thank you emails and remarks from people about how meaningful Sunday night was.

So in that context, I want to offer a few remarks. First, we do tragedy really well. The majority of those of humanity who are good and caring find our ways to each other in times of need. How wonderful it would be if we could do the same at moments that are celebratory and those of shared observance. We in the Jewish faith always say at such times – May we all be worthy of sharing many joyful moments together. Yes, if we want to really feel community, let us share those moments too such as acknowledging our shared valuing of Thanksgiving as Americans, or coming together for important community conversations about critical issues that threaten even the peaceful and celebrated existence of communities like Squirrel Hill and Cheltenham, on opposite sides of Pennsylvania.

Secondly, and this is not a statement of politics, but of common decency at least and a foundational Jewish value (shared by other faiths) at most – WATCH OUR WORDS and teach our children to do the same. HOLD OUR LEADERS ACCOUNTABLE for what they say, for words certainly do lead to deeds and anyone who claims otherwise has not been paying attention to the world in which we live, like, forever. That is why in Proverbs we read “Death and life are at the hand of our tongue” – the mercy of what we say. Notice death is mentioned first, emphasizing the known idiom THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK.

Finally, remember that our faiths ask us to be the best we can be. The fact that it was communities of faith who came together throughout this country and elsewhere in our world is significant. G-d wants us to love each other and to care about each other, for EVERY HUMAN BEING is made BeTzelem Elokim. Islam, Christianity and Judaism all hold as core the notion that we should love and care for the other as we do ourselves. When you look at someone else and see the reflection of yourself in their eyes and the God piece of their soul, one has to love one’s neighbor as oneself, maybe not always like, or agree with, but love as in respecting and honoring that at our core, we are all little tiny pieces of God who created us all.

When one forgets that, one loses their humanity. May the memories of eleven souls and the worlds they represented from the Tree Of Life Congregation and those of the policemen and first responders who have left this world for us to tend and fix always be for a blessing.

What are we teaching and learning and losing along the way?

It’s all around us – more and more technology and less and less interaction with each other. I think that this, too, is a dynamic that has contributed to where we are in our world at the present time. I am often involved in discussions dedicated to how we get people to listen to and interact intentionally and meaningfully with each other and not shout each other down, which seems to be the preferred way to go for too many people in our world today.

Schools are increasing their use of technology, which has its obvious advantages, However, unfortunately, in too many cases this is done at the expense of teaching about how to be community – both what one gets from being part of a collective and the responsibility that goes into being a contributing member of a larger group of people.

According to a Nielsen report, adults in the United States watch five hours and four minutes of television per day on average (35.5 h/week, slightly more than 77 days per year). According to the Kaiser Family Foundation, kids ages 8-18 now spend, on average, 7.5 hours in front of a screen for entertainment each day, 4.5 of which are spent watching TV. Over a year, that adds up to 114 full days watching a screen for fun and not interacting with other people, learning and honing social skills and participating in interactive athletic or creative activity. Conversely, numerous studies indicate that families spend a total of 34 – 35 minutes together as a family unit per day on average, and little of that is used for communication. The family was always the first social frontier for children and traditionally it was within the context of this social unit that children learned how to communicate, share space with others, have compassion for one another, listen and so on. At this point, this is severely compromised, though there is good news as more and more modern families are cutting screen time and other diversions significantly and intentionally planning family time and planned interactive involvements with increasing regularity.

Schools (including those considered to be some of our better ones) have in some cases become places where kids are left to their own devices with on line learning materials, and may end up doing nothing but playing and watching screens until they are caught (which has happened). This is now the main means of “interaction,” – programmed, distilled, biased and doing the thinking for too many people today. Again, while our motivated students can move faster and more efficiently with this delivery of their educational program, we must ask at what cost. This is consistent with so many observations and complaints regarding our present media- driven culture, including worries about our children’s communication skills beyond texting and IM’ing. How do we roll it back?

As an educator who has worked so hard to help students develop these skills of collaboration and cooperation through the decades of my professional activity, I am horrified and scared that in many ways, the hard work that my colleagues and I engaged in with great success is no longer valued. We have always held that the role of education was not to facilitate the production of automatons yet in some of our educational venues, that is what is happening. Individuals are so wrapped up with their own progress and trajectory, they do not stop to think about the other people around them; and then stop to consider how we can learn with and from each other, contributing to a self-centered way of viewing one’s world.

In collaborating and cooperating with others we are forced to go outside of ourselves, perhaps even, to move from our comfort zone to our courage zone. Doing so should be celebrated and valued at this point in our lives when so much is at stake as we watch in horror as basic skills of communication and being concerned about what you hear as much as what I say is being sidelined for the repeated loud and, often, offensive shouting we observe in our daily lives.

Is this really the world we want our children to grow up in and repeat for generations to come? I would suggest that we all insure that we work on communication skills and demand that our schools do the same. Otherwise all of one’s acquired knowledge will not be used for the potential good it can serve. This is not the first time we are confronting this dilemma; our history is riddled with it. It just seems that the stakes continue to get higher and unless we really care about and interact with each other in a meaningful way…. Well, we already see the other option too present in our world!

There is a New Supreme Court Justice in Place – What Have We Learned and Where Do We Go Now?

So here is my alternate reality. Judge Brett Kavanaugh is up to be a Supreme Court Justice. The country is terribly fractured due to poor examples of acting like an adult that are coming from the seat of the Executive Branch of our government, unfortunately. Scream, call people names, bully anyone and everyone who challenges you and so on …. By the way, Melania, didn’t you say you wanted to address bullying? Where are you when we need just that?

Anyway, so there is a judge that is being questioned and it gets difficult as evidence is uncovered of less than seemly, even horrible, behavior of this same person in his teen years and apparently into his twenties. Let’s imagine that this information comes to light and the judge who should have an even and appropriate temperament insists calmly that he has no memory of certain aspects of that time, while admitting to behavior that he is not proud of and regrets. A woman makes a very difficult statement about what happened to her and Kavanaugh’s involvement. She insists it happened; he insists it did not. There is an impasse. And then the statement I would hope could be made might go something like this. “Dr. Ford, I am sincerely sorry for what happened to you. That is truly horrible. I honestly do not have any memory of it. Yes, I did act like so many kids and did things I am not proud of and do definitely regret. If there is any chance that in fact I was involved as you say, Dr. Ford, I humbly apologize and in doing so would ask all of us to consider how foolish and inappropriate behaviors on any of our parts cold result in horrific memories and impact on others. I am truly sorry for anything I may have done that hurt anyone in such a profound way. That being said, I ask that all look at my record during the past twenty-five years. Yes, I am a conservative, but as you can see, I have voted with my conscience, not always adhering to one or the other ideology. I listen, I consider and I try to do what is right. I ask for forgiveness for the missteps of youth as I imagine we all do at times and again, Dr. Ford, I am truly sorry for what happened to you though I have no memory of being involved.”

So back to where we are. There is anger, frustration, ugly facial expressions, inappropriate accusations, disrespect for public officials, inappropriate and hurtful interactions, and a general disregard for what is honorable, while our children are watching and too many adults shake their heads in complete horror. We also note that too much of our society has now taken a page from that aforementioned Head of State’s playbook and think this is perfectly okay. Then we wonder why there is more violence, more disrespect, increasing lines of fracture and complete frustration in a country that we used to have such pride in for so many reasons. There is no wonder here, as Robert Bly (author of The Sibling Society) explains, that now instead of children looking at fairy tales and wanting to rid the world of the monsters that haunt us, they want to BECOME the monsters. That is what we are witnessing in our lives today.

Senators Coons and Flake, we need you, we need your friendship and respect that exist alongside your differences, we need to go back to the basics of how to act as human beings and for each and every one of us to remember that our way is not the only way. I do think that this has been a horrible display --- but not of the behavior of those of one political party, as the other political party has charged, but rather of the loss of common decency at the highest levels of the government of the land that claims that decency is a fundamental part of who we are. At this point, I am sad to say we as a country are NOT THAT and instead have become so much of what we abhorred for so long in other parts of the world. What do we do to get back to the example and reality we are supposed to be and how do we truly reclaim our identity as “one nation under God?” I am sure that God (however one refers to that entity) is crying “My children, my children, what has happened?” -- as the prophets taught so long ago.

An Important Lesson on Intersectionality from Camille Cosby

Erev Sukkot, this past Sunday morning, I looked at the newspaper as we always do on Sunday morning.. There on the first page was the trifecta of one of our most compelling major societal problems – articles about the situation with Judge Kavanaugh and Dr. Ford, a story about a Priest who had sexually abused multiple members of one family as well as others and one entitled ‘Cosby back in Court this week for sentencing.” Further along in the paper there was yet another article about a young man who had been sexually bused by his priest and ultimately took his life, because he could no longer live with the truth that was his life. Needless to say, I was depressed as well as overwhelmed by what has gone so wrong that the most basic right of sanctity and safety of self has become more political pawn in our public sphere than the fundamental value we have all cherished and fought so hard to achieve.

I was particularly horrified when Camille Cosby and her husband’s publicists were reported to have “compared him to civil rights icons Nelson Mandela and Emmett Till, insisting that he, too, is the victim of corrupt and racist justice system.”. Later in the week, his legal counsel stated “he is being persecuted like Jesus.”. Really???? If in fact these individuals did not say this, then shame on those who did; however, as I heard the latter comment from the person to whom it is ascribed, I do doubt this is the case and those who are responsible for these comments should be ashamed of themselves.

There is this phenomenon in our contemporary society and language called INTERSECTIONALITY. It is particularly invoked by our young 20- and 30-somethings to challenge all of us to look around us and consider the plight of others at best, and at worst, collapse all wrongs of society as they perceive them to be as one and the same. As defined by Webster and others, “intersectionality is an analytic framework which attempts to identify how interlocking systems of power impact those who are most marginalized in society.” At its best, this notion states that if one is concerned about one victimized or maligned portion of our population and human family, than we should be concerned about others. That is to say that people of color should care deeply about women, those with physical limitations should show compassion for those with mental or emotional limitations, LGBTQ community members should work to advocate for the rights of immigrants who are taking a difficult hit, to say the least, Jews should advocate for Muslims (which by the way, Rabbi Lord Jonathan Sacks often claims), and so on. The theory of intersectionality as presently and properly practiced basically sets up situations where all of us should and must be sensitive to the vulnerabilities of others and this is a noble agenda for many self-evident reasons. For some, we think of it as common decency, which unfortunately is not quite so common as it should be in today’s fractured world.

However, intersectionality is NOT without its potential pitfalls, as is the case with any ideology or theory. Here is where Camille Cosby and her husband’s supporters come in. Really? Like Nelson Mandela or Emmett Till? Comparisons to Jesus? Okay, this is INTERSECTIONALITY running amuck. As someone who goes into internal shock every time someone just thoughtlessly and way too easily compares anyone they decide is an oppressor or perceived wrongdoer as a Nazi or when Israel is cast in the same tonal colors as governing entities who hang their own citizens just for being who they are, I am once again saddened and horrified that we as a society have become so thoughtless and careless that we reduce our lives to meaningless and hurtful soundbites, no longer honoring those who have been victimized by truly horrific entities but claiming that all perceived victims are the same no matter what they may have done and even if they are not actually victims but rather perpetrators of wrongdoing.

Black lives DO matter and ME TOO is an important initiative and we must all remember that if our parents and grandparents came to this country seeking sanctuary, we should apply those principles appropriately so that the United States of America can continue to provide such to those who are truly victims of torture and whose lives are in peril. That being said, ALL THOSE WHO ARE CHARGED WITH WRONGDOING are not the same and are not equal. Please, can we all just remember that we are supposedly people of reason and leave the histrionics aside! No, Camille Cosby, your husband is no Nelsom Mandela or Emmett Till and I would hope you will reconsider how you have maligned their names and their battles.

MY BEST ROSH HASHANA EVER

This year for a variety of reasons, Ken and I tried something completely different. We decided to go to a Rosh HaShana retreat at Isabella Friedman Retreat Center. I was all ready to channel my inner hippie from decades ago and to get into a Kumbaya zone, though I knew there was an Orthodox minyan for davening (prayers) and the food is strictly Kosher. Actually, friends of our recommended this Retreat Center from their experience during another Chag (holiday), so we decided to see what it was all about.

We got in our car on Sunday and prepared for the approximately four-hour drive to Connecticut, just over the state line shared with New York. We took the scenic route avoiding the Turnpikes and the peace and calm of all that we saw, even with rain, that seemed to be an ongoing theme throughout the three and a half days, was just breath-taking. We arrived at this beautiful retreat center that certainly did not disappoint. It was beautiful, bucolic even, with water (in the lake, not just coming down from the clouds), fields, trails (which I had hoped to try out but maybe next time when the water is only in the lake), beautiful cabins and lovely large spaces for gathering.

Isabella Friedman Retreat Center is a completely environmentally conscious and sustainable space and the food is reported to be amazing. So now, I can attest to the notion that this is not just a matter of report, but experience. The food was plentiful, beautifully presented and nourished the body completely. The surroundings were perfect for the contemplative nature of the beginning of these Ten Days of Returning to God that is part of the annual cycle of the rhythm of Jewish life and living. Sustainable practices are clearly front and center and one is definitely aware that the food we eat has a source, is grown and produced and served by the members of the internal community who live and work at the resort with pride and respect for the environment that provides us with all of these gifts.

There were two prayer options for the Rosh HaShana observance, one Orthodox and one Egalitarian. Additionally, there were members of the community that came together who just walked, hiked, talked, meditated, thought and just came to be in this inspiring and inspired space. The minute we walked into the Orthodox prayer space as well as entered the dining tent, it was clear that yes, my inner hippie was indeed in its happy space but there was actually quite a wide swath of people present – geographically (though most participants were from New York and New Jersey, people were there from California, Washington State and Toronto as well as many other regions of the United States), generationally (no we were NOT the only people there over the age of forty!), in terms of observance, sexuality, gender identity, with regard to what people eat and do not eat, and so on .. and we stayed in dorm like bunks, nice beautiful cabins (that would be Ken and me), tents and a variety of places to rest and relax. Multi-generational families, couples, individuals, groups of friends and just Jews of so many different orientations were part of this little world that would evolve over approximately 72 hours.

One of the biggest surprises and joys for me was the prayer experience. I too often get the impression that people feel that Rosh HaShana is a chore to get through, with way too many pages in the Machzor (prayer book) and up to nine hours of each of two days, as well as a good chunk of time the previous evening when it begins so as to seem rather daunting at best. But this was absolutely not the case. Rabbi Avraham Arieh Trugman spoke about the joy along with the judgment of the observance and the balance of so many different elements, that indeed may seem paradoxical, but in truth ask of us to bring our whole and complete selves to the Rosh HaShana experience. This was exactly what I felt – transported to that place where all of me was there. The singing and the communal voices raised as one led by Rabbi Avram Mlotek, the quiet contemplative prayer elements and the joy of being in this assemblage all combined to truly make this a special and meaningful Rosh HaShana. Each time we finished our long services, we did not race to leave, but rather danced and sang – sharing that joy that makes community at its best. This was exactly what I always want my prayer and community to be, and it was indeed that.

Another great joy for me in this space was the real feeling of Klal Yisrael. The various continuums listed above in terms of who was there added so much to the experience. People floated in and out of various groups, even between the prayer options, and there seemed to be this seamless sense of yes, we are this community, invested in each other and caring about those around us. Conversations were deep and new friendships celebrated with hopes of seeing each other again. I was honored to be teaching two classes, which also showed the value of bringing people together who may not pray the same, think the same and live the same, but in fact we are all part of the same unified whole. We truly celebrated what we shared and honored and respected differences as well. This was a huge part of this experience for me, and gives me something to hold onto as we re-enter our fractured world.

When I find myself in these spaces of diversity within unity and unity of diversity, I am bolstered and reminded of how we can and do build bridges and go back and forth across them, instead of being contained by fences and walls. The respect shown by all whether it was a traditionally clad Orthodox Rabbi or a Rabbi from the Egalitarian group who was female or a communal leader dressed more casually, it did not matter who said Kiddush, gave a D’var Torah or led Birkat HaMazon. We all did what we needed to do to fulfill our own traditions and practice; and more importantly, we were all Jews who came together hoping for and trying to begin a new year with positive energy and meaningful experience.

We learn that the true miracle of Mount Sinai and the giving of Torah was that all came with “one heart and one voice.” We read during this observance that Abraham and Yitzchak approached the challenge of the Akeidah “the two of them together as one.” This is what I long for - that all of us come together with our different voices, various levels of observance, words of prayer, authentic selves, varied garb and amazing and wonderful ideas – and come to build amazing unity, enriched by the many forms of diversity we bring. Happy 5779 to all and thank you Isabella Friedman Retreat Center for a truly singularly inspiring Rosh HaShana.

Gimar Tov to all - may those of us in our Jewish cycle of observances be sealed for a good, meaningful and purposeful life in the coming year.