Oh dear, what is happening to our Jewish Educational Institutions?
I have worked in the field of Jewish Education for thirty five years. I have seen so many developments during that time; for a long time, many of these changes were positive and exciting. When I began my position as Educational/Youth Director for a large synagogue early in my career thirty years ago, I promised myself that I would create a meaningful viable Jewish community and the experiences that the students, teachers, family and all vested members would have within that community that I would work hard to facilitate would be different … different from the staid, programmed experience I had experienced in my younger years – you know the days when you walked in the house with the SAME book that your mother used in Hebrew school and this was a GOOD thing! I do feel that I was successful and still run into people from that chapter of my life, including the friendships I have maintained since then, and we speak with love and fond memories of that time. I was feeling good as I moved from that experience on to others and really was heartened by the fact that I am my colleagues were making profound differences in the field of Jewish education – in Central Agencies, afternoon school systems, day schools, formal and informal settings, and so forth.
Those were also the years of a wonderful organization called the Coalition for the Advancement of Jewish Education (CAJE), which became, among other things, the annual watering hole for creative Jewish educators, those who were challenging boundaries and barriers in everything from how one teaches and transmits information to the very definitions of what it means to be Jewish, observant and so many other things. Together, we shared our dreams and hopes for our communities in our fishbowl on random university campuses in this country as well as Israel and during the year, we tried to actualize some of those dreams and hopes – in our various settings in all our denominational groupings. These were indeed heady and exciting times for a Jewish educator that wanted to make a profound difference in the larger world of Jewish education, and then….
Here I sit, in 2010, disillusioned and extremely disappointed. Several of my wonderful colleagues – some of the most creative, committed Jews and passionate people I have ever met – are no longer in the ranks of Jewish education. Others languish in institutions that no longer dream and move towards a vision – not the way we used to. Too often, this profession and the communities that support it have eaten up their best and thrown them to the curb. How sad and depressing. CAJE ran its course for many reasons though there are a few hearty souls trying to restart it. I do have some intermittent contact with wonderful colleagues from different settings in which we meet – often in Israel or as parents of children that are friends of my children and choose and go to the same University communities where committed Jewish kids feel comfortable and validated. But we all share a feeling of the passing of an era. Yes, to be sure, there are wonderful schools out there, fabulous communities to be found, and people who are still excited about what they are doing…. But, the reality is that many of the communities in which I have worked as a consultant through the years have lost their own dreams and sense of future vision. I definitely see and feel this where I live.
In my own larger Jewish community in which three of our four children went through the day schools that we have and graduated, our fourth child, a wonderful, insightful, Jewishly committed 14 year old that exudes a sense of integrity and respect, attends public school due to the fact that he needs to be in an institution in which people treat each other with respect and the vision is shared, and he and those with whom he learns as well as those that teach and lead them have a sense in which direction they are moving. Sadly, we had to pull him out of day schools for reasons of compromised personal safety, not even considering what were increasing profound academic concerns.
I note that Financial Managers, COO’s and CEO’s are now more important in our educational institutions than seasoned, capable and experienced Jewish educators in too many cases. I have often heard statements to the effect that “I do not understand. This school used to have a vision and a soul. Now it is a business, one that is supposed to make money.” A business that is supposed to make money?! What happened to the days when our schools and educational institutions were known to be our loss leaders in the supermarket of Jewish agencies and institutions? This was our investment in our future – created an educated, excited, able Jewish population and they WILL be our wonderful leaders of tomorrow. The buildings may not have been the best and various aspects of the institution not state-of-the-art, but the places in which such learning occurred were often happy, soulful and nurturing venues. In the past year and a half, so many day schools have closed, programs that were dedicated to the professional enrichment of seasoned educators terminated, tuitions for day school education are now being compared to “other private schools in the area” and many families are forced out of this option, afternoon programs are more watered down than ever, there are less vehicles for shared visioning, and there are lots of granted dollars being spent on….., well, state-of-the-art technology and beautiful buildings and I am not sure what, too often. What has happened?
In our Orthodox community as is the case elsewhere, we have many more public school families than one might expect. Families acknowledge having to compromise on many things they believe (not to mention choking their family budget considerably) and “close their eyes” so that they can send their children to day school, and in these schools there are behaviors and occurrences that would NEVER be acceptable on any level in my son’s public school (back to that matter of personal safety).
What is wrong with this picture? Someone might say it is a personal reaction (even ranting) BUT I am most certainly not the only one with this story. None of my children will even consider going into Jewish education as a profession – the work which I felt so passionately about for so long. Years ago, I was so in love with my work, I desperately wanted at least one of them to continue and move into this path. Now, in 2010, I no longer feel this way. Some time ago, an older and beloved colleague once said to me, “I do not envy you, Sunnie. This was a great profession for me; so much is changing I am not sure what it will be for you.” For many years I disagreed respectfully with her as I was so excited and invigorated by my work. Now, I think she was prophetic. How sad!
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Friday, March 5, 2010
The Power and Challenge of Community and the Spirit that Guides It
The Power and Challenge of Community and the Spirit that Guides It
We in our worldwide Jewish community just celebrated Purim, for which the story is told in the last chronological chapter of the Tanach. We always note, as we read the Megilah, that G-d’s name seems to be eerily absent in this story. We all know of the accounts of how scrolls of Megilat Esther were used to wrap other scrolls and texts of Torah when they had to be saved in times of terror, such as the Holocaust precisely because of the absence of the name of G-d in its words and verses. Ironically, while this particular narrative of Jewish existence and survival was used as packing material, the fact is that G-d was truly protecting all of the texts that were being shielded in this special covering; just as G-d is always there for us, whether perceived directly or not. This was as it should be, and as it was in the story of Esther itself in which there are many screens through which the power of G-d comes through and gives fortitude to the community G-d was guiding. Whether found in the very name of Esther, in the many times the word Melech is used, the notion that the saving power for the Jews will come from another place – mimakom acher – or even in special encoded pesukim, we generally agree that G-d was clearly present throughout the saga that we just read this past week.
While one has to look for and acknowledge that G-d is found in the personae, actions and events of this chapter of Jewish history at some point in the fourth century b.c.e.; on the other end of the spectrum, G-d’s name appears constantly in the beginning of Bereshit. One cannot miss G-d’s direct and obvious presence in the formative stages of our existence as a universe and a human community. G-d has to act directly upon every aspect of Creation as G-d is alone and without partner. In fact, many take the entirety of the Biblical narrative as the story of how G-d comes to partner with the human being individually and ultimately with the human community that the individuals build collectively with G-d guiding them.
In this week’s Parsha, Ki Tisa, appearing towards the end of Sefer Shemot, we read about a census that is taken as all members of the community prepare to act and function as a complete unit, with a Mishkan, leadership of its Kohanim, laws in place and so much else that has been accomplished in their arduous and adventurous journey on the way to becoming the Jewish people. As we consider this narrative which is set during the years between the leaving of Egypt and taking on the responsibility of forging a group identity in preparation for living in their own promised land of Eretz Yisrael, we note the need for the B’nai Yisrael to become a functioning community, with a sense of independence and confidence. Yet, we also see in this Parsha that this is not to be – not at this point anyway.
In one of the saddest tales to date in our Torah readings, we read the narrative of the Egel HaZahav, which represents a test taken and failed, and the resulting loss of community strength and its need for rebuilding. As we read about the perceived absence of G-d by people, we must sadly admit that they are not yet ready for the independence that they would need to take as they moved into their destined future.
As we read this difficult text about the power and the potential of the group, we are also confronted with the problematic nature of group mentality. In the beginning of Chapter 32 of Shemot, we are told
א וַיַּ֣רְא הָעָ֔ם כִּֽי־בֹשֵׁ֥שׁ מֹשֶׁ֖ה לָרֶ֣דֶת מִן־הָהָ֑ר וַיִּקָּהֵ֨ל הָעָ֜ם עַֽל־אַֽהֲרֹ֗ן וַיֹּֽאמְר֤וּ אֵלָיו֙ ק֣וּם ׀ עֲשֵׂה־לָ֣נוּ אֱלֹהִ֗ים אֲשֶׁ֤ר יֵֽלְכוּ֙ לְפָנֵ֔ינוּ כִּי־זֶ֣ה ׀ מֹשֶׁ֣ה הָאִ֗ישׁ אֲשֶׁ֤ר הֶֽעֱלָ֨נוּ֙ מֵאֶ֣רֶץ מִצְרַ֔יִם לֹ֥א יָדַ֖עְנוּ מֶה־הָ֥יָה לֽוֹ: ב וַיֹּ֤אמֶר אֲלֵהֶם֙ אַֽהֲרֹ֔ן פָּֽרְקוּ֙ נִזְמֵ֣י הַזָּהָ֔ב אֲשֶׁר֙ בְּאָזְנֵ֣י נְשֵׁיכֶ֔ם בְּנֵיכֶ֖ם וּבְנֹֽתֵיכֶ֑ם וְהָבִ֖יאוּ אֵלָֽי: ג וַיִּֽתְפָּֽרְקוּ֙ כָּל־הָעָ֔ם אֶת־נִזְמֵ֥י הַזָּהָ֖ב אֲשֶׁ֣ר בְּאָזְנֵיהֶ֑ם וַיָּבִ֖יאוּ אֶֽל־אַֽהֲרֹֽן: ד וַיִּקַּ֣ח מִיָּדָ֗ם וַיָּ֤צַר אֹתוֹ֙ בַּחֶ֔רֶט וַֽיַּֽעֲשֵׂ֖הוּ עֵ֣גֶל מַסֵּכָ֑ה וַיֹּ֣אמְר֔וּ אֵ֤לֶּה אֱלֹהֶ֨יךָ֙ יִשְׂרָאֵ֔ל אֲשֶׁ֥ר הֶֽעֱל֖וּךָ מֵאֶ֥רֶץ מִצְרָֽיִם:
Roughly translated, we read as follows:
And the nation saw that Moshe delayed coming down from the mountain and they gathered and pounced on Aaron. They said to him, “Get up and make for us a god that will go before us, because this man, Moshe, that brought us up from the land of Egypt left and we have no idea where he is. We need direction! So, Aaron said to them, “Take the rings of gold that are in the ears of your wives, your sons, and your daughters and bring them to me. The people removed these rings of gold that were in their ears and they brought them to Aaron. Aaron took them from their hands and put them together and created for them a golden calf (egel masecha). They said, “This is your G-d Israel that has brought you up from the land of Egypt.”
The B’nai Yisrael feel that they have been abandoned. Where is G-d? Where is Moshe? Who will lead them in the perceived absence of their leaders? Who will teach and guide them through the coming challenges they will no doubt face? They are afraid and in that fear, the very sense of balance and understanding of who they are as a group is also absent.
What is the purpose of group? It is meant to strengthen and validate who we are. Its raison d’etre is to provide a forum for a collective of people with shared values and beliefs to move forward. Here the group fails, the community falters. Aaron knows this and obviously while many commentators try to figure out why exactly he plays along with this sham, perhaps he hopes to show the B’nai Yisrael how immature they really are, needing a physical, albeit false, representation of the power that guides them.
Note that while G-d is always here, covering and protecting the group with G-d’s protective nature, direct leadership is invested in others – in Aaron, and in Moshe. The B’nai Yisrael have matured and are continuing to do so, even through these obvious setbacks. They were supposed to take responsibility and do their part as well as acknowledge that G-d’s presence may be more nuanced but there at all times, nonetheless.
Here is where they failed. G-d is, until today, seen in the actions and motivations of human beings according to many theologians and Jewish thinkers across the spectrum of belief. We question and we wrestle with G-d individually and as a community, but we try to remember that as in Megilat Esther, G-d is always there, to be perceived through the many screens in our lives. Hopefully, we have progressed significantly since the generation of the Egel HaZahav and do not need to revert to a shallow and false physical presence to indicate this, no matter what challenges we face as individuals or as a group.
We in our worldwide Jewish community just celebrated Purim, for which the story is told in the last chronological chapter of the Tanach. We always note, as we read the Megilah, that G-d’s name seems to be eerily absent in this story. We all know of the accounts of how scrolls of Megilat Esther were used to wrap other scrolls and texts of Torah when they had to be saved in times of terror, such as the Holocaust precisely because of the absence of the name of G-d in its words and verses. Ironically, while this particular narrative of Jewish existence and survival was used as packing material, the fact is that G-d was truly protecting all of the texts that were being shielded in this special covering; just as G-d is always there for us, whether perceived directly or not. This was as it should be, and as it was in the story of Esther itself in which there are many screens through which the power of G-d comes through and gives fortitude to the community G-d was guiding. Whether found in the very name of Esther, in the many times the word Melech is used, the notion that the saving power for the Jews will come from another place – mimakom acher – or even in special encoded pesukim, we generally agree that G-d was clearly present throughout the saga that we just read this past week.
While one has to look for and acknowledge that G-d is found in the personae, actions and events of this chapter of Jewish history at some point in the fourth century b.c.e.; on the other end of the spectrum, G-d’s name appears constantly in the beginning of Bereshit. One cannot miss G-d’s direct and obvious presence in the formative stages of our existence as a universe and a human community. G-d has to act directly upon every aspect of Creation as G-d is alone and without partner. In fact, many take the entirety of the Biblical narrative as the story of how G-d comes to partner with the human being individually and ultimately with the human community that the individuals build collectively with G-d guiding them.
In this week’s Parsha, Ki Tisa, appearing towards the end of Sefer Shemot, we read about a census that is taken as all members of the community prepare to act and function as a complete unit, with a Mishkan, leadership of its Kohanim, laws in place and so much else that has been accomplished in their arduous and adventurous journey on the way to becoming the Jewish people. As we consider this narrative which is set during the years between the leaving of Egypt and taking on the responsibility of forging a group identity in preparation for living in their own promised land of Eretz Yisrael, we note the need for the B’nai Yisrael to become a functioning community, with a sense of independence and confidence. Yet, we also see in this Parsha that this is not to be – not at this point anyway.
In one of the saddest tales to date in our Torah readings, we read the narrative of the Egel HaZahav, which represents a test taken and failed, and the resulting loss of community strength and its need for rebuilding. As we read about the perceived absence of G-d by people, we must sadly admit that they are not yet ready for the independence that they would need to take as they moved into their destined future.
As we read this difficult text about the power and the potential of the group, we are also confronted with the problematic nature of group mentality. In the beginning of Chapter 32 of Shemot, we are told
א וַיַּ֣רְא הָעָ֔ם כִּֽי־בֹשֵׁ֥שׁ מֹשֶׁ֖ה לָרֶ֣דֶת מִן־הָהָ֑ר וַיִּקָּהֵ֨ל הָעָ֜ם עַֽל־אַֽהֲרֹ֗ן וַיֹּֽאמְר֤וּ אֵלָיו֙ ק֣וּם ׀ עֲשֵׂה־לָ֣נוּ אֱלֹהִ֗ים אֲשֶׁ֤ר יֵֽלְכוּ֙ לְפָנֵ֔ינוּ כִּי־זֶ֣ה ׀ מֹשֶׁ֣ה הָאִ֗ישׁ אֲשֶׁ֤ר הֶֽעֱלָ֨נוּ֙ מֵאֶ֣רֶץ מִצְרַ֔יִם לֹ֥א יָדַ֖עְנוּ מֶה־הָ֥יָה לֽוֹ: ב וַיֹּ֤אמֶר אֲלֵהֶם֙ אַֽהֲרֹ֔ן פָּֽרְקוּ֙ נִזְמֵ֣י הַזָּהָ֔ב אֲשֶׁר֙ בְּאָזְנֵ֣י נְשֵׁיכֶ֔ם בְּנֵיכֶ֖ם וּבְנֹֽתֵיכֶ֑ם וְהָבִ֖יאוּ אֵלָֽי: ג וַיִּֽתְפָּֽרְקוּ֙ כָּל־הָעָ֔ם אֶת־נִזְמֵ֥י הַזָּהָ֖ב אֲשֶׁ֣ר בְּאָזְנֵיהֶ֑ם וַיָּבִ֖יאוּ אֶֽל־אַֽהֲרֹֽן: ד וַיִּקַּ֣ח מִיָּדָ֗ם וַיָּ֤צַר אֹתוֹ֙ בַּחֶ֔רֶט וַֽיַּֽעֲשֵׂ֖הוּ עֵ֣גֶל מַסֵּכָ֑ה וַיֹּ֣אמְר֔וּ אֵ֤לֶּה אֱלֹהֶ֨יךָ֙ יִשְׂרָאֵ֔ל אֲשֶׁ֥ר הֶֽעֱל֖וּךָ מֵאֶ֥רֶץ מִצְרָֽיִם:
Roughly translated, we read as follows:
And the nation saw that Moshe delayed coming down from the mountain and they gathered and pounced on Aaron. They said to him, “Get up and make for us a god that will go before us, because this man, Moshe, that brought us up from the land of Egypt left and we have no idea where he is. We need direction! So, Aaron said to them, “Take the rings of gold that are in the ears of your wives, your sons, and your daughters and bring them to me. The people removed these rings of gold that were in their ears and they brought them to Aaron. Aaron took them from their hands and put them together and created for them a golden calf (egel masecha). They said, “This is your G-d Israel that has brought you up from the land of Egypt.”
The B’nai Yisrael feel that they have been abandoned. Where is G-d? Where is Moshe? Who will lead them in the perceived absence of their leaders? Who will teach and guide them through the coming challenges they will no doubt face? They are afraid and in that fear, the very sense of balance and understanding of who they are as a group is also absent.
What is the purpose of group? It is meant to strengthen and validate who we are. Its raison d’etre is to provide a forum for a collective of people with shared values and beliefs to move forward. Here the group fails, the community falters. Aaron knows this and obviously while many commentators try to figure out why exactly he plays along with this sham, perhaps he hopes to show the B’nai Yisrael how immature they really are, needing a physical, albeit false, representation of the power that guides them.
Note that while G-d is always here, covering and protecting the group with G-d’s protective nature, direct leadership is invested in others – in Aaron, and in Moshe. The B’nai Yisrael have matured and are continuing to do so, even through these obvious setbacks. They were supposed to take responsibility and do their part as well as acknowledge that G-d’s presence may be more nuanced but there at all times, nonetheless.
Here is where they failed. G-d is, until today, seen in the actions and motivations of human beings according to many theologians and Jewish thinkers across the spectrum of belief. We question and we wrestle with G-d individually and as a community, but we try to remember that as in Megilat Esther, G-d is always there, to be perceived through the many screens in our lives. Hopefully, we have progressed significantly since the generation of the Egel HaZahav and do not need to revert to a shallow and false physical presence to indicate this, no matter what challenges we face as individuals or as a group.
Monday, February 22, 2010
More from Rabbi Jonathan Sacks and a Great Children's Riddle
More from Rabbi Jonathan Sacks and a Great Children’s Riddle
I am still reading To Heal a Fractured World by Rabbi Jonathan Sacks. As my daughter Talie tells me, the sign of a great book is when it is difficult not to underline and reread every line. True! I find this to be especially the case in this book. I am only reading a few pages at a time and then digesting what they have taught me before continuing. This, I think, is the way this book is best read. So, this past Shabbat (on which of course, I am not underlining, which is definitely a benefit in many ways – however, I did go back and add the appropriate indicator of emphasis on Sunday) I was reminded by Rebbe Sacks of an old children’s riddle. He uses it to remind us of the nature of G-d. That works. I want to take some poetic license here and use it to make a point about human rights and our responsibility to the world in which we all live. Here goes!
There are three people who have worked together to accomplish a task and in the course of the day they have earned seventeen gold coins. Because of the fact that they have each made different contributions to the accomplishment of the task, they decide to divide the coins proportionally, according to the contribution each has made. They decide as follows: The first person should receive ½ of the total payment; the second person should receive 1/3 of the total payment; and the third person should receive 1/9 of the total payment. They try and try and cannot come up with an equitable way to divide the coins. What should they do? They come to you for the solution.
Think about this. What can you do as they have come to you for the solution? What can you offer them? What advice and WORDS will you offer them? Is there something else you should be giving them in their attempt to solve their problem? As the puzzle or riddle continues, the solution is suggested as follows:
You should add one gold coin to the collection, making a total of eighteen gold coins. NOW each person can take their appropriate pay – The first person received nine gold coins; the second gets six gold coins; and the last person receives two gold coins. Guess how many are left! YOU get YOUR COIN back!
What is the lesson here? In the riddle, you have not only given advice and words, but you have given from your resources as well. In the end, the three people have a solution, and you have NOT LOST A THING! How wonderful if we could see community service and helping others in the same way. Sure, we give time, money and resources to help others in our world. But in so doing, we are creating solutions for others, while not losing anything of value in terms of who we are and what we have. Further, in creating and facilitating solutions, we are helping ourselves by creating a more sustainable and reasonable environment in which we can all live.
Thank you Rabbi Sacks for reminding me of this wonderful riddle and its solution! To be sure, it teaches an important lesson about G-d and what gives us. Further, it reminds us that we should follow the example G-d sets for us and be gracious, for in giving to others, we get so much in return without losing a thing!
I am still reading To Heal a Fractured World by Rabbi Jonathan Sacks. As my daughter Talie tells me, the sign of a great book is when it is difficult not to underline and reread every line. True! I find this to be especially the case in this book. I am only reading a few pages at a time and then digesting what they have taught me before continuing. This, I think, is the way this book is best read. So, this past Shabbat (on which of course, I am not underlining, which is definitely a benefit in many ways – however, I did go back and add the appropriate indicator of emphasis on Sunday) I was reminded by Rebbe Sacks of an old children’s riddle. He uses it to remind us of the nature of G-d. That works. I want to take some poetic license here and use it to make a point about human rights and our responsibility to the world in which we all live. Here goes!
There are three people who have worked together to accomplish a task and in the course of the day they have earned seventeen gold coins. Because of the fact that they have each made different contributions to the accomplishment of the task, they decide to divide the coins proportionally, according to the contribution each has made. They decide as follows: The first person should receive ½ of the total payment; the second person should receive 1/3 of the total payment; and the third person should receive 1/9 of the total payment. They try and try and cannot come up with an equitable way to divide the coins. What should they do? They come to you for the solution.
Think about this. What can you do as they have come to you for the solution? What can you offer them? What advice and WORDS will you offer them? Is there something else you should be giving them in their attempt to solve their problem? As the puzzle or riddle continues, the solution is suggested as follows:
You should add one gold coin to the collection, making a total of eighteen gold coins. NOW each person can take their appropriate pay – The first person received nine gold coins; the second gets six gold coins; and the last person receives two gold coins. Guess how many are left! YOU get YOUR COIN back!
What is the lesson here? In the riddle, you have not only given advice and words, but you have given from your resources as well. In the end, the three people have a solution, and you have NOT LOST A THING! How wonderful if we could see community service and helping others in the same way. Sure, we give time, money and resources to help others in our world. But in so doing, we are creating solutions for others, while not losing anything of value in terms of who we are and what we have. Further, in creating and facilitating solutions, we are helping ourselves by creating a more sustainable and reasonable environment in which we can all live.
Thank you Rabbi Sacks for reminding me of this wonderful riddle and its solution! To be sure, it teaches an important lesson about G-d and what gives us. Further, it reminds us that we should follow the example G-d sets for us and be gracious, for in giving to others, we get so much in return without losing a thing!
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Sedarim and Their Meaning
I, as everyone else in our observant practicing community, grew up with our annual Pesah Sedarim. There was always something quite magical and wonderful about the pageantry and the preparations that went into these special meals. In fact, we know that this resonates with the larger Jewish community, including both those who are observant to any degree and those who are not. Population and demographic studies continually and consistently show that more than any other single practice; Jews will have some meal that bears some resemblance to a Seder to mark the holiday and observance of Pesah. This of course is so fitting – that we as a people observe collectively and differently the marker of the one event that made us a people and a nation, namely when G-d took the B’nai Yisrael out of the Land of Mitzrayim. How many of us have wonderful memories of our own recitation of the Four Questions, the taste of our favorite Charoset recipe, the singing of songs around the table, all of the food, family and so much else? The Seder itself, meaning order, was a script we followed as we recounted so much about who we are as a people, believers in G-d and a community. Growing up in the observant Jewish home into which I was born, preparations for this annual feast and celebration would take months. The very word Seder evokes memories of this entire process which may appear to the outsider as somewhat chaotic but definitely had its own order as we prepared for the order and script of the festival and its various components.
Now, as an adult, I have come to appreciate the observance of other Sedarim during the course of the year. Very dear friends of ours, Rabbi Joshua (z’l) and Esther Toledano and their family have introduced our family of Ashkenazic Jews to their Moroccan Sephardic customary Rosh HaShanah Seder. We now enjoy this celebration annually with our joint families. The idea of stopping to appreciate so many of G-d’s created things and to ponder their inner meanings seems like such a wonderful way to complement the Tefillot and other practices associated with this serious and full time of the year. As we begin our new year of human history and personal as well as communal growth and actions, what a meaningful way to remind ourselves of the ultimate system of interdependence of which we are all a part that brings land, the waters, all created things and beings, G-d and us together in an inextricably connected way. The notion that each tangible and physical thing we consume represents a higher ideal, theme, or aspiration is also meaningful in a most profound way, especially at this season of reflection and taking account of self.
Also in my adult years, we have added the Tu Bishvat Seder to our repertoire. As we sit in the midst of the winter months with snow on the ground as often as not, we sit and celebrate our trees and the land and water that facilitates their growth as they are so critically necessary to our well being. The fact that Judaism recognizes this is quite astounding and powerful. We celebrate what nourishes us and of course, The Creator of all parts of our system of interdependence of which we are part. This seder, with its colorful foods and cheerful tone, clearly reminds us of the cycle of life as we celebrate the budding of all things while bundling up (at least where we live) to protect ourselves from the cold.
The word appreciation just keeps coming back into my mind. We appreciate our people hood and our going out of Mitzrayim with the hand and direction of G-d. We celebrate this appreciation and remembrance through the Pesah Seder. We appreciate that all things are part of the world that we acknowledge and take account of on Rosh HaShanah. Once again, there is a scripted Seder to help us through this appreciation in an orderly manner. Of course, Tu Bishvat is also a wonderful time to celebrate and appreciate all that G-d has created for our use and for us to tend and nurture as well as be nurtured by it, as exemplified by our beautiful and bountiful trees. The notion that we use Sedarim, with their own scripts and orders, to celebrate and acknowledge, yes appreciate, the order of all that G-d created and put here just seems to make sense…. In fact, it is quite orderly, don’t you think?!
Now, as an adult, I have come to appreciate the observance of other Sedarim during the course of the year. Very dear friends of ours, Rabbi Joshua (z’l) and Esther Toledano and their family have introduced our family of Ashkenazic Jews to their Moroccan Sephardic customary Rosh HaShanah Seder. We now enjoy this celebration annually with our joint families. The idea of stopping to appreciate so many of G-d’s created things and to ponder their inner meanings seems like such a wonderful way to complement the Tefillot and other practices associated with this serious and full time of the year. As we begin our new year of human history and personal as well as communal growth and actions, what a meaningful way to remind ourselves of the ultimate system of interdependence of which we are all a part that brings land, the waters, all created things and beings, G-d and us together in an inextricably connected way. The notion that each tangible and physical thing we consume represents a higher ideal, theme, or aspiration is also meaningful in a most profound way, especially at this season of reflection and taking account of self.
Also in my adult years, we have added the Tu Bishvat Seder to our repertoire. As we sit in the midst of the winter months with snow on the ground as often as not, we sit and celebrate our trees and the land and water that facilitates their growth as they are so critically necessary to our well being. The fact that Judaism recognizes this is quite astounding and powerful. We celebrate what nourishes us and of course, The Creator of all parts of our system of interdependence of which we are part. This seder, with its colorful foods and cheerful tone, clearly reminds us of the cycle of life as we celebrate the budding of all things while bundling up (at least where we live) to protect ourselves from the cold.
The word appreciation just keeps coming back into my mind. We appreciate our people hood and our going out of Mitzrayim with the hand and direction of G-d. We celebrate this appreciation and remembrance through the Pesah Seder. We appreciate that all things are part of the world that we acknowledge and take account of on Rosh HaShanah. Once again, there is a scripted Seder to help us through this appreciation in an orderly manner. Of course, Tu Bishvat is also a wonderful time to celebrate and appreciate all that G-d has created for our use and for us to tend and nurture as well as be nurtured by it, as exemplified by our beautiful and bountiful trees. The notion that we use Sedarim, with their own scripts and orders, to celebrate and acknowledge, yes appreciate, the order of all that G-d created and put here just seems to make sense…. In fact, it is quite orderly, don’t you think?!
Friday, January 22, 2010
Right.... now about free choice....
So, in my teaching, lecturing and chatting about the BIG issues of G-d, us and life, often the topic of free choice and many related questions come up. Do we really have it? How free is our choice, really? This is always a difficult question in terms of understanding and accepting G-d’s control over all while simultaneously acknowledging that we as human beings have the right to choose our own destinies, or so we think. Further, when we discuss the element of choice, we have to also address the responsibility we must use in choosing.
This is particularly relevant as we consider the Parshiot we are presently reading. Here we see that this issue of G-d’s control and its relationship to the freedom we have to choose intersect with each other in a manner that many find to be problematic. Rabbi David Ellenson calls it Condemned to Be Free (what kind of choice is that?) in his writings when speaking about the following text from Parshat Va’Era.
Notice what we read in Shemot 7: 1 – 5:
א וַיֹּ֤אמֶר יְהוָֹה֙ אֶל־מֹשֶׁ֔ה רְאֵ֛ה נְתַתִּ֥יךָ אֱלֹהִ֖ים לְפַרְעֹ֑ה וְאַֽהֲרֹ֥ן אָחִ֖יךָ יִהְיֶ֥ה נְבִיאֶֽךָ: ב אַתָּ֣ה תְדַבֵּ֔ר אֵ֖ת כָּל־אֲשֶׁ֣ר אֲצַוֶּ֑ךָּ וְאַֽהֲרֹ֤ן אָחִ֨יךָ֙ יְדַבֵּ֣ר אֶל־פַּרְעֹ֔ה וְשִׁלַּ֥ח אֶת־בְּנֵֽי־יִשְׂרָאֵ֖ל מֵֽאַרְצֽוֹ: ג וַֽאֲנִ֥י אַקְשֶׁ֖ה אֶת־לֵ֣ב פַּרְעֹ֑ה וְהִרְבֵּיתִ֧י אֶת־אֹֽתֹתַ֛י וְאֶת־מֽוֹפְתַ֖י בְּאֶ֥רֶץ מִצְרָֽיִם: ד וְלֹֽא־יִשְׁמַ֤ע אֲלֵכֶם֙ פַּרְעֹ֔ה וְנָֽתַתִּ֥י אֶת־יָדִ֖י בְּמִצְרָ֑יִם וְהֽוֹצֵאתִ֨י אֶת־צִבְאֹתַ֜י אֶת־עַמִּ֤י בְנֵֽי־יִשְׂרָאֵל֙ מֵאֶ֣רֶץ מִצְרַ֔יִם בִּשְׁפָטִ֖ים גְּדֹלִֽים: ה וְיָֽדְע֤וּ מִצְרַ֨יִם֙ כִּֽי־אֲנִ֣י יְהֹוָ֔ה בִּנְטֹתִ֥י אֶת־יָדִ֖י עַל־מִצְרָ֑יִם וְהֽוֹצֵאתִ֥י אֶת־בְּנֵֽי־יִשְׂרָאֵ֖ל מִתּוֹכָֽם:
And G-d says to Moshe, Look I place you in the role representing G-d to Pharaoh, and your brother Aaron as your prophet. You will speak all that I command you and Aaron your brother will speak to Pharaoh and he will send the B’nai Yisrael from his land. And I will harden the heart of Pharaoh that I may multiply my signs and wonders in the land of Mitzrayim. Pharaoh will not listen to you, and I will put My hand upon Mitzrayim and I will take out My people, the B’nai Yisrael from the land of Mitzrayim with great oppressive deeds. And the Egyptians will know that I am G-d as I stretch out My hand upon Mitzrayim and I take out the B’nai Yisrael from their midst.
As many readers of this text will undoubtedly ask, where do we see any opportunity or possibility of human’s ability to choose? Moshe is the leader because G-d decides that he will be so and Pharaoh is a hard hearted despot because G-d decides this as well, right? Further, remember the whole purpose of determining what role each player has is to magnify the “signs and wonders” of G-d. Well for many this is a most reasonable and understandable explanation. However, when one considers that G-d’s all encompassing knowledge, which is not bound by time, chronology or special limitations, does NOT include the sequencing of action that we normally think of as human beings, this throws the very foundation of this reasoning to the winds. In other words what we are reading in sequential order actually represents occurrences in a realm, G-d’s realm, in which this order is not operative in the same way that we understand it to be so in our daily reality. I think the true challenge of using the free choice that we are given, and is really the source of our humanity according to Ramban in his commentary on the creation of the human being, is to use it responsibly. That is to say the free choice we are given is not without limits and unfettered, rather it is a tool to be used discriminately and properly. Perhaps, some would say, this is not free choice at all. I call it the informed and disciplined right to choose.
So, now let’s go back to Pharaoh. We note that we have no indication of G-d’s action upon Pharaoh directly until we are already in the throes of the story. We learn elsewhere that the true character of our being is indicated by our actions. Rambam teaches us in Hilchot Teshuvah that when one wants to change his actions and repent, this attempt must be sincere and meaningful. One is NOT, according to Rambam, able to say “I will sin and then I will ask for forgiveness, I will sin again and then I will ask for forgiveness,” and have this pattern continue indefinitely. It is instructive to look at the Catholic Church and watch how they have changed the process of the sacrament of Confession due to this very problem, which is just as much a human option as any other we choose.
So, we must ask, by acknowledging that G-d hardened Pharaoh’s heart, what exactly are we attributing as G-d’s involvement here? G-d will NOT facilitate the repentance or feeling remorse on the part of mankind. THIS WE MUST DO OURSELVES. This very point is made in the Gemara in Berachot 33b when we read that G-d gives us so much and provides us with many facilities, but YIRAT SHAMAYIM – our coming to G-d and recognizing that we are accountable in our actions – THIS WE MUST DO FOR OURSELVES. Further, Rambam teaches in Hilchot Teshuvah that a person can act in such a horrible manner that he can ultimately prevent himself from coming back to good actions and good interactions with others. Rav Kook supports this notion as well in his explanation of the plan and path the human being takes in life. Think of what we know about the sociopath – who is hardening their heart? Are they created that way? Of course, we can always blame the Creator for making them this way. But in doing this, what do we relinquish of the foundational meaning of who we are as human beings?
What if we give ourselves the credit for the choices we make? If we talk about the incredible mensch who is in our lives or the amazing person who beet such odds to go on and do wonderful things and credit them (as we should) for their efforts, why does this not work on the other end of the scale of human actions? We all know those “damaged souls” who come from wonderful families and backgrounds and yet go off their derech so to speak. If we are going to acknowledge that we get to choose, then we must also acknowledge our responsibility for the consequences of those choices. I know this is hard to absorb, but (not to be funny) what other choice do we truly have?
So, is G-d happy when people, G-d’s created beings, use their ability to choose for destructive and hurtful reasons? I do not believe that this is so. Here I will join others who think that G-d intentionally holds back at such junctures because what point is there to the gift to choose if we cannot truly choose and if we are constantly protected from the negative effects of these choices. There is presently a series of commercials on American television created by an Insurance company that paints a thought provoking picture for us on exactly this point. In one of these, a young girl is given a new bicycle. She starts to ride it, but then the person who has given her the bicycle says, “No, see that small yellow square you are in. You cannot ride the bicycle outside of the square.” What if we could not REALLY use our gift of choice in life, just as the girl cannot truly use her bicycle? Clearly, this is not the point of free choice.
So, while it is easy to BLAME G-d for our poor choices and CREDIT ourselves for good ones, this is certainly questionable in terms of being an even-handed approach. Now let’s go back to the text from Berachot. We are given many resources and characteristics – that is G-d’s part. Now, we have to CHOOSE how to use our resources and characteristics – that is our part -- to choose and use these abilities with responsibility!
This is particularly relevant as we consider the Parshiot we are presently reading. Here we see that this issue of G-d’s control and its relationship to the freedom we have to choose intersect with each other in a manner that many find to be problematic. Rabbi David Ellenson calls it Condemned to Be Free (what kind of choice is that?) in his writings when speaking about the following text from Parshat Va’Era.
Notice what we read in Shemot 7: 1 – 5:
א וַיֹּ֤אמֶר יְהוָֹה֙ אֶל־מֹשֶׁ֔ה רְאֵ֛ה נְתַתִּ֥יךָ אֱלֹהִ֖ים לְפַרְעֹ֑ה וְאַֽהֲרֹ֥ן אָחִ֖יךָ יִהְיֶ֥ה נְבִיאֶֽךָ: ב אַתָּ֣ה תְדַבֵּ֔ר אֵ֖ת כָּל־אֲשֶׁ֣ר אֲצַוֶּ֑ךָּ וְאַֽהֲרֹ֤ן אָחִ֨יךָ֙ יְדַבֵּ֣ר אֶל־פַּרְעֹ֔ה וְשִׁלַּ֥ח אֶת־בְּנֵֽי־יִשְׂרָאֵ֖ל מֵֽאַרְצֽוֹ: ג וַֽאֲנִ֥י אַקְשֶׁ֖ה אֶת־לֵ֣ב פַּרְעֹ֑ה וְהִרְבֵּיתִ֧י אֶת־אֹֽתֹתַ֛י וְאֶת־מֽוֹפְתַ֖י בְּאֶ֥רֶץ מִצְרָֽיִם: ד וְלֹֽא־יִשְׁמַ֤ע אֲלֵכֶם֙ פַּרְעֹ֔ה וְנָֽתַתִּ֥י אֶת־יָדִ֖י בְּמִצְרָ֑יִם וְהֽוֹצֵאתִ֨י אֶת־צִבְאֹתַ֜י אֶת־עַמִּ֤י בְנֵֽי־יִשְׂרָאֵל֙ מֵאֶ֣רֶץ מִצְרַ֔יִם בִּשְׁפָטִ֖ים גְּדֹלִֽים: ה וְיָֽדְע֤וּ מִצְרַ֨יִם֙ כִּֽי־אֲנִ֣י יְהֹוָ֔ה בִּנְטֹתִ֥י אֶת־יָדִ֖י עַל־מִצְרָ֑יִם וְהֽוֹצֵאתִ֥י אֶת־בְּנֵֽי־יִשְׂרָאֵ֖ל מִתּוֹכָֽם:
And G-d says to Moshe, Look I place you in the role representing G-d to Pharaoh, and your brother Aaron as your prophet. You will speak all that I command you and Aaron your brother will speak to Pharaoh and he will send the B’nai Yisrael from his land. And I will harden the heart of Pharaoh that I may multiply my signs and wonders in the land of Mitzrayim. Pharaoh will not listen to you, and I will put My hand upon Mitzrayim and I will take out My people, the B’nai Yisrael from the land of Mitzrayim with great oppressive deeds. And the Egyptians will know that I am G-d as I stretch out My hand upon Mitzrayim and I take out the B’nai Yisrael from their midst.
As many readers of this text will undoubtedly ask, where do we see any opportunity or possibility of human’s ability to choose? Moshe is the leader because G-d decides that he will be so and Pharaoh is a hard hearted despot because G-d decides this as well, right? Further, remember the whole purpose of determining what role each player has is to magnify the “signs and wonders” of G-d. Well for many this is a most reasonable and understandable explanation. However, when one considers that G-d’s all encompassing knowledge, which is not bound by time, chronology or special limitations, does NOT include the sequencing of action that we normally think of as human beings, this throws the very foundation of this reasoning to the winds. In other words what we are reading in sequential order actually represents occurrences in a realm, G-d’s realm, in which this order is not operative in the same way that we understand it to be so in our daily reality. I think the true challenge of using the free choice that we are given, and is really the source of our humanity according to Ramban in his commentary on the creation of the human being, is to use it responsibly. That is to say the free choice we are given is not without limits and unfettered, rather it is a tool to be used discriminately and properly. Perhaps, some would say, this is not free choice at all. I call it the informed and disciplined right to choose.
So, now let’s go back to Pharaoh. We note that we have no indication of G-d’s action upon Pharaoh directly until we are already in the throes of the story. We learn elsewhere that the true character of our being is indicated by our actions. Rambam teaches us in Hilchot Teshuvah that when one wants to change his actions and repent, this attempt must be sincere and meaningful. One is NOT, according to Rambam, able to say “I will sin and then I will ask for forgiveness, I will sin again and then I will ask for forgiveness,” and have this pattern continue indefinitely. It is instructive to look at the Catholic Church and watch how they have changed the process of the sacrament of Confession due to this very problem, which is just as much a human option as any other we choose.
So, we must ask, by acknowledging that G-d hardened Pharaoh’s heart, what exactly are we attributing as G-d’s involvement here? G-d will NOT facilitate the repentance or feeling remorse on the part of mankind. THIS WE MUST DO OURSELVES. This very point is made in the Gemara in Berachot 33b when we read that G-d gives us so much and provides us with many facilities, but YIRAT SHAMAYIM – our coming to G-d and recognizing that we are accountable in our actions – THIS WE MUST DO FOR OURSELVES. Further, Rambam teaches in Hilchot Teshuvah that a person can act in such a horrible manner that he can ultimately prevent himself from coming back to good actions and good interactions with others. Rav Kook supports this notion as well in his explanation of the plan and path the human being takes in life. Think of what we know about the sociopath – who is hardening their heart? Are they created that way? Of course, we can always blame the Creator for making them this way. But in doing this, what do we relinquish of the foundational meaning of who we are as human beings?
What if we give ourselves the credit for the choices we make? If we talk about the incredible mensch who is in our lives or the amazing person who beet such odds to go on and do wonderful things and credit them (as we should) for their efforts, why does this not work on the other end of the scale of human actions? We all know those “damaged souls” who come from wonderful families and backgrounds and yet go off their derech so to speak. If we are going to acknowledge that we get to choose, then we must also acknowledge our responsibility for the consequences of those choices. I know this is hard to absorb, but (not to be funny) what other choice do we truly have?
So, is G-d happy when people, G-d’s created beings, use their ability to choose for destructive and hurtful reasons? I do not believe that this is so. Here I will join others who think that G-d intentionally holds back at such junctures because what point is there to the gift to choose if we cannot truly choose and if we are constantly protected from the negative effects of these choices. There is presently a series of commercials on American television created by an Insurance company that paints a thought provoking picture for us on exactly this point. In one of these, a young girl is given a new bicycle. She starts to ride it, but then the person who has given her the bicycle says, “No, see that small yellow square you are in. You cannot ride the bicycle outside of the square.” What if we could not REALLY use our gift of choice in life, just as the girl cannot truly use her bicycle? Clearly, this is not the point of free choice.
So, while it is easy to BLAME G-d for our poor choices and CREDIT ourselves for good ones, this is certainly questionable in terms of being an even-handed approach. Now let’s go back to the text from Berachot. We are given many resources and characteristics – that is G-d’s part. Now, we have to CHOOSE how to use our resources and characteristics – that is our part -- to choose and use these abilities with responsibility!
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Living on the Periphery by Divine Design and Choice??
So who/what am I, you ask? Okay, I like the term Reconservadox for all types of reasons. But no, this does not quite capture it. It feels like a catch all term without commitment and conviction. Therefore, I like to use precise terms so Orthoprax-Conservadox-Halachic-Klal Yisrael’nik works for me but its way too big to fit on a bumper sticker which makes it an unwieldy descriptor. So I’ll go with one of my students who recently asked so wisely and simply “Can’t you just say you’re Jewish?” Works for me!!! So, now what is my community?
This is a discussion that my children, my husband and I have constantly. Each one of my three daughters could speak as well as write at great length about how they each do not belong wholly to any one community for all types of reasons. Yes, I have taught them well. Our youngest, our son, seems to be moving in the same direction as well. Makes a mother proud!!!! But, before we rejoice too much, let’s understand how difficult it truly is to fit in a bit in a lot of places but not completely in any one place.
I often explain that I am on the outer circle (periphery, if you will) of many different groupings and not completely in the center of any of them. I am fine with this, and I really believe that G-d does not have too much of a problem with it either. So why even care and discuss this here or anywhere else? Because, I also live within the reality of the constraints and parameters of the real world and in that world, everyone wants (and thinks they NEED) to know exactly what group each person belongs to, whatever that may mean. So who are the people in my group? I could give you some names, in addition to the people I have referenced above, but I am not sure that would help. Rather, I will try to explain by what criteria I define my identity in my banner less group of believing, practicing, committed Jews.
I believe in G-d and that G-d has created all of us. I believe that ALL OF US includes every type of Jew, monotheist, person of faith and person. I believe that ALL OF US have equal access to G-d if we care to exercise the option. I believe that we are all responsible for our own being and that of those around us, as we must learn the skill sets and values of living in the ongoing system of interdependence of which we are a part whether or not we like to think of ourselves in such a fashion. I believe that basically we are all good people that are doing the best we can with what we have and that G-d guides us in reaching our potential, but we ultimately have to accomplish set goals and aspirations through proper use of our choice and desire. I believe that the Torah and all texts that ensue in the long tradition that begins with it provide us with a blueprint of how to be the best we can be and make this universe of which we are a part a better place.
Further, I believe that as a Shomer Mitzvot ritualistically observant Jew (I know, more terms to confuse), it is my RESPONSIBILITY to work on my relationship with G-d, my relationship with other members of my Jewish community (ALL OF IT) and my relationship with all members of my human family. That means a strong commitment to social justice, acceptance of all who are different in belief, lifestyle, and any other aspect of their being, and accepting the commanded obligation that G-d has placed upon me to share and care with and for all those around me.
Now, this resonates in many corridors of our larger Jewish community but often not so much within our dovenning – walking distance from the shul - Shomer Shabbat and Kashrut community. It is this wall of separation that often frustrates and hurts the members of my family. So culturally and in terms of so many values of human kindness and acceptance (Gemilut Chesed), we often find we have much more in common with the drive to synagogue – eat out in restaurants – dress anyway you like - not so consistently observant of rituals community. But then our social interactions are sometimes limited there. So, like the story/poem of the Meshiach who comes to earth and tries to find a shul but his head covering is never quite right, we continue to find ourselves on the periphery of so many different groupings. As my daughter Talie points out, this allows us to be part of so many different realities – kind of participating in the smorgasbord of life and living and believing. I like smorgasbords – you get to taste and enjoy it all! I really think that G-d does get it and that is why G-d created all of us and our differences in this smorgasbord of life. How sad that too many of us do not take advantage of the wonderful opportunity of learning and sharing with each other. Thank you G-d for creating the periphery and thank you G-d for placing me on it!
This is a discussion that my children, my husband and I have constantly. Each one of my three daughters could speak as well as write at great length about how they each do not belong wholly to any one community for all types of reasons. Yes, I have taught them well. Our youngest, our son, seems to be moving in the same direction as well. Makes a mother proud!!!! But, before we rejoice too much, let’s understand how difficult it truly is to fit in a bit in a lot of places but not completely in any one place.
I often explain that I am on the outer circle (periphery, if you will) of many different groupings and not completely in the center of any of them. I am fine with this, and I really believe that G-d does not have too much of a problem with it either. So why even care and discuss this here or anywhere else? Because, I also live within the reality of the constraints and parameters of the real world and in that world, everyone wants (and thinks they NEED) to know exactly what group each person belongs to, whatever that may mean. So who are the people in my group? I could give you some names, in addition to the people I have referenced above, but I am not sure that would help. Rather, I will try to explain by what criteria I define my identity in my banner less group of believing, practicing, committed Jews.
I believe in G-d and that G-d has created all of us. I believe that ALL OF US includes every type of Jew, monotheist, person of faith and person. I believe that ALL OF US have equal access to G-d if we care to exercise the option. I believe that we are all responsible for our own being and that of those around us, as we must learn the skill sets and values of living in the ongoing system of interdependence of which we are a part whether or not we like to think of ourselves in such a fashion. I believe that basically we are all good people that are doing the best we can with what we have and that G-d guides us in reaching our potential, but we ultimately have to accomplish set goals and aspirations through proper use of our choice and desire. I believe that the Torah and all texts that ensue in the long tradition that begins with it provide us with a blueprint of how to be the best we can be and make this universe of which we are a part a better place.
Further, I believe that as a Shomer Mitzvot ritualistically observant Jew (I know, more terms to confuse), it is my RESPONSIBILITY to work on my relationship with G-d, my relationship with other members of my Jewish community (ALL OF IT) and my relationship with all members of my human family. That means a strong commitment to social justice, acceptance of all who are different in belief, lifestyle, and any other aspect of their being, and accepting the commanded obligation that G-d has placed upon me to share and care with and for all those around me.
Now, this resonates in many corridors of our larger Jewish community but often not so much within our dovenning – walking distance from the shul - Shomer Shabbat and Kashrut community. It is this wall of separation that often frustrates and hurts the members of my family. So culturally and in terms of so many values of human kindness and acceptance (Gemilut Chesed), we often find we have much more in common with the drive to synagogue – eat out in restaurants – dress anyway you like - not so consistently observant of rituals community. But then our social interactions are sometimes limited there. So, like the story/poem of the Meshiach who comes to earth and tries to find a shul but his head covering is never quite right, we continue to find ourselves on the periphery of so many different groupings. As my daughter Talie points out, this allows us to be part of so many different realities – kind of participating in the smorgasbord of life and living and believing. I like smorgasbords – you get to taste and enjoy it all! I really think that G-d does get it and that is why G-d created all of us and our differences in this smorgasbord of life. How sad that too many of us do not take advantage of the wonderful opportunity of learning and sharing with each other. Thank you G-d for creating the periphery and thank you G-d for placing me on it!
Monday, December 28, 2009
Selectiveness, Favoritism and Exclusive Privilege – A Few Important Lessons
So, as we continue to read about the travails and challenges of being Yoseph in the ongoing text of our Parshiot HaShavuah, one just has to wonder – what lessons do we learn here about favoritism and its impact? Yes, Yoseph was Yaakov’s favorite son, continuing a long tradition of parental favoritism in the families of Bereshit; the Jews (we are often taught and proclaim) are G-d’s favorite people, and so goes life! What are we to do about this predicament?
I often teach that if we would all stop screaming at each other within the Jewish community, there are many important lessons we can and certainly should learn from each other. Let’s consider one of the most profound and fundamental teachings of Reconstructionist Judaism for just a moment, understanding that it may be challenging for some of us to do so – and that, my friends, is exactly the point! By ideology, the notion that the Jewish people are chosen as G-d’s favorite is basically rejected in this particular ideological system. As a result of rejection of this belief, references to such a chosen status are removed from the rhythm and content of prayer in this part of our larger Jewish community. Why exactly have our Reconstructionist Jewish friends replaced the Bracha of “who has chosen us from all of the nations” with “bring us closer with [G-d’s] commandments,” to mention one such change?
Now, to be sure, many ritualistically observant and Halachically oriented Jews will bristle at the notion of changing the words of our time-honored Siddur text. However, instead of tsk-tsking, let us wonder for a moment about what exactly the Reconstructionist fathers (and mothers) saw that brought them to this decision. I remember having these discussions with some of the movement’s leaders years ago. These words were removed precisely, according to how it was explained to me, because they conveyed a sense of superiority and selectiveness, which runs counter-intuitive to the Reconstructionist dedication to inclusivity and the love for all Jews and all of mankind. What exactly is wrong with this idea, you may ask or not care to ask. So, I did pose the following question to one of my Reconstructionist Rabbi friends in these discussions so long ago: Could we clarify exactly what the Jews were chosen for and educate the masses regarding the responsibility and role modeling we were to take on; thus clarifying the words asher bachar banu instead of removing them? What then ensued was a rather lengthy conversation in which many others became involved regarding how members of OUR Jewish community take on the notion of chosenness with such a superior air and judge other Jews and members of the human family with such passion and prejudice, it is hard to get back to rooted meanings of chosenness. Much is being written on this very painful phenomenon at this point in time.
This was part of what brought many Reconstructionist Jews to take on the agenda of inclusivity and equality for and of all people as a foundational defining element of their identity. Within this framework, I believe that many Jews across the spectrum, if they (we!) can be objective for just a moment, would not necessarily disagree with this move. That being said, I think it is a justifiable argument to posit that chosenness does not always mean such things as superiority or being “better or more favored” than others, though it is understood that there are many textual and linguistic references that do convey exactly this idea. However, this is NOT the focus of this piece here.
Now, let us return to Yoseph and his position in his family. His father gives his favorite son a special gift, Yoseph reports his strange dreams to all and we are told that he reports back to his father about the behavior of his brothers in the field. This is not exactly the makings of wonderful sibling relationships, to be sure. Do we fault the brothers for their treatment of Yoseph and deceiving their father; or do we look at the favorite son and ask some hard questions about what one can and should do with such a status?
I often say that to blindly (or in very good faith!) justify all of the aberrant or questionable actions of our Avot v’Emahot might be missing the challenge that Ribbonu shel Olam is putting before us in these rich and troubled (as well as troubling) narratives. What if the power of these stories is to teach us what NOT to do as well as what to do? At the end of the Yoseph narrative, one could make the point that he is overcome with the ramifications of his own actions as well as the separation that has occurred for so many years between him and his own family. As one psychologist teaches, rejection or absence of a nuclear family member leaves a hole in one’s heart, shaped with the profile of the family member not in one’s life. How many holes were there in Yoseph’s heart and how comforted must he have been when the rifts were finally resolved on whatever level! Clearly, when speaking of fault there was much to go around. Who in this family behaved honorably concerning this relationship? To be sure, there are some ideas expressed by our commentators regarding this as well, all to be trumped by the notion that Yoseph was fulfilling some divine plan to be in a specific place at a specific time to fulfill a specific mission. If this is the focus, it is easy to look away at how the members of this family treated each other. However, my contention is that this is exactly what we are NOT supposed to do in terms of learning and absorbing the full strength of the lessons these stories come to teach us.
Today, we teach that EVERY CHILD and EVERY PERSON is special with their own talents, perceptions and what they offer. That is to say, EACH AND EVERY PERSON IS CHOSEN for SOME DEED or MISSION. If we could embrace this idea and come to the place where we many not always understand each other or what we are doing and learn to ask questions regarding these misunderstandings instead of hurling insults, perhaps we would be able to heed the teaching of our Reconstructionist friends and look at chosenness differently. Imagine what we could learn about ourselves and others in doing so!
VIVA LA DIFFERENCE!
I often teach that if we would all stop screaming at each other within the Jewish community, there are many important lessons we can and certainly should learn from each other. Let’s consider one of the most profound and fundamental teachings of Reconstructionist Judaism for just a moment, understanding that it may be challenging for some of us to do so – and that, my friends, is exactly the point! By ideology, the notion that the Jewish people are chosen as G-d’s favorite is basically rejected in this particular ideological system. As a result of rejection of this belief, references to such a chosen status are removed from the rhythm and content of prayer in this part of our larger Jewish community. Why exactly have our Reconstructionist Jewish friends replaced the Bracha of “who has chosen us from all of the nations” with “bring us closer with [G-d’s] commandments,” to mention one such change?
Now, to be sure, many ritualistically observant and Halachically oriented Jews will bristle at the notion of changing the words of our time-honored Siddur text. However, instead of tsk-tsking, let us wonder for a moment about what exactly the Reconstructionist fathers (and mothers) saw that brought them to this decision. I remember having these discussions with some of the movement’s leaders years ago. These words were removed precisely, according to how it was explained to me, because they conveyed a sense of superiority and selectiveness, which runs counter-intuitive to the Reconstructionist dedication to inclusivity and the love for all Jews and all of mankind. What exactly is wrong with this idea, you may ask or not care to ask. So, I did pose the following question to one of my Reconstructionist Rabbi friends in these discussions so long ago: Could we clarify exactly what the Jews were chosen for and educate the masses regarding the responsibility and role modeling we were to take on; thus clarifying the words asher bachar banu instead of removing them? What then ensued was a rather lengthy conversation in which many others became involved regarding how members of OUR Jewish community take on the notion of chosenness with such a superior air and judge other Jews and members of the human family with such passion and prejudice, it is hard to get back to rooted meanings of chosenness. Much is being written on this very painful phenomenon at this point in time.
This was part of what brought many Reconstructionist Jews to take on the agenda of inclusivity and equality for and of all people as a foundational defining element of their identity. Within this framework, I believe that many Jews across the spectrum, if they (we!) can be objective for just a moment, would not necessarily disagree with this move. That being said, I think it is a justifiable argument to posit that chosenness does not always mean such things as superiority or being “better or more favored” than others, though it is understood that there are many textual and linguistic references that do convey exactly this idea. However, this is NOT the focus of this piece here.
Now, let us return to Yoseph and his position in his family. His father gives his favorite son a special gift, Yoseph reports his strange dreams to all and we are told that he reports back to his father about the behavior of his brothers in the field. This is not exactly the makings of wonderful sibling relationships, to be sure. Do we fault the brothers for their treatment of Yoseph and deceiving their father; or do we look at the favorite son and ask some hard questions about what one can and should do with such a status?
I often say that to blindly (or in very good faith!) justify all of the aberrant or questionable actions of our Avot v’Emahot might be missing the challenge that Ribbonu shel Olam is putting before us in these rich and troubled (as well as troubling) narratives. What if the power of these stories is to teach us what NOT to do as well as what to do? At the end of the Yoseph narrative, one could make the point that he is overcome with the ramifications of his own actions as well as the separation that has occurred for so many years between him and his own family. As one psychologist teaches, rejection or absence of a nuclear family member leaves a hole in one’s heart, shaped with the profile of the family member not in one’s life. How many holes were there in Yoseph’s heart and how comforted must he have been when the rifts were finally resolved on whatever level! Clearly, when speaking of fault there was much to go around. Who in this family behaved honorably concerning this relationship? To be sure, there are some ideas expressed by our commentators regarding this as well, all to be trumped by the notion that Yoseph was fulfilling some divine plan to be in a specific place at a specific time to fulfill a specific mission. If this is the focus, it is easy to look away at how the members of this family treated each other. However, my contention is that this is exactly what we are NOT supposed to do in terms of learning and absorbing the full strength of the lessons these stories come to teach us.
Today, we teach that EVERY CHILD and EVERY PERSON is special with their own talents, perceptions and what they offer. That is to say, EACH AND EVERY PERSON IS CHOSEN for SOME DEED or MISSION. If we could embrace this idea and come to the place where we many not always understand each other or what we are doing and learn to ask questions regarding these misunderstandings instead of hurling insults, perhaps we would be able to heed the teaching of our Reconstructionist friends and look at chosenness differently. Imagine what we could learn about ourselves and others in doing so!
VIVA LA DIFFERENCE!
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