Hopes for Healing in 2022 – Can We Begin By Getting To Know Each Other?

Today is the one-year anniversary of January 6, 2021. I remember well exactly where I was and what I was doing an how horrified I was. Same feeling as September 11, 2001. Both acts of hatred, terrorism and lack of any sense of empathy for humanity. Both adamite statements of I AM RIGHT and anyone who disagrees with me is wrong and so much more. Too many people killed and lives permanently damaged due to hatred and lack of knowledge of “the other,” among many other dynamics. I woke up with this feeling of sadness and devastation at the destruction of so much I hold dear.

Then I turned on the television to check in on the news this morning and this is what I heard. It was a narrative of the goodness of so many with a kidney donation chain that began with one family searching for a kidney amongst their own and not finding a match BUT there was a match to someone else on the registry and then that family searched for someone to donate… and a chain of love, compassion, and saving the sanctity of lives was begun – without concern for race, religion, political beliefs, ethnicity or…. It was an affirmation that WE ARE ALL PART OF THIS HUMAN FAMILY. I feel better and energized to do the work I do today and going forth…

Earlier this week I had the pleasure of learning Torah and related Jewish topics with my 7-year old and 11-year old (x 2, they are twins) granddaughters. We generally learn weekly and in both of our lessons this past Monday we were talking about separation and divisions – specifically those that God makes in Creation of the world as we know and experience. You know, Bereshit/Genesis Chapter One, where God is constantly dividing – light and darkness, day and night, land and water, waters above and waters below and so on. The 11-year-olds and I were exploring how this notion of separation can lead to trouble. God separated and divided, organizing all so we could move on from chaos of “tohu v’vohu” – the massive confusion that needed organization or it was nothingness --- to organization and structure so that we could function. Then the 7-year old and I were discussing Parshat HaShavuah (the weekly Torah portion we learn and read in shul) about Pharaoh and the plagues and that here too there were many instances of separation and divisions.

We learn that separations and dividing all that is allows us to use what we have in more productive ways. BUT, it was NOT lost on these smart young ladies that separation can also lead to thinking that one is better than the other – light preferable to dark, day not as scary as night, and the slippery slope is short until we apply these distinctions to each other, the color of our skin, the nature of our religious beliefs, the political party to which we subscribe, and so on. THIS was not the intention, I believe, of God making these divisions.

Rather, I seek out differences and love the unique nature of each element in our world and how everything combines to result in something so much more powerful than the individual parts that compose it. Think about it – dissect a beautiful sunset in your mind, notice all of the different elements, and how they all combine to give you this breathtaking effect. Why can we not do the same with each other?

One of my favorite teachings of the sacred text of Islam, the Qur’an is Sura 49:13 where we learn

We have created you all out of a male and a female, and have made you into nations and tribes, so that you might come to know one another.

In Judaism, we know all too well that we begin the narrative of our faith with the story of Creation that my lovely young scholars are learning as they prepare for their B’not Mitzvah next year, when they will share some of these lessons with those who come to celebrate with them. We know that we are ALL B’nai Adam – the children of Adam. We too teach that we should all remember that we share ancestors and should treat each other accordingly. This is what I strive for every day, whether in my work finding accepting and welcoming communities for LGBTQ observant Jews with Eshel or in my Multi-Faith work with so many incredible colleagues or in the many shiyurim (classes and lessons) I share with others. We all know we share so much and respect our differences. We know to ask when we do not understand something and DO NOT attack or assume. We build bridges that connect not fences that divide. We come to know each other across so many potential divides and instead appreciate the tapestery of humanity we represent. This is what bolsters me.

To be sure I will watch the January 6 anniversary observances today. I will also watch the celebration of Betty White’s one hundred years (according to the Jewish/Hebrew calendar she did make it to 100 years and 7 days) of goodness and compassion and I will carry with me the joint message of those wonderful donors and recipients in the kidney donation chain. There I find hope and optimism that as my husband Ken always says, there are more good people in the world who care and want what is right for all than others who do not…. and I pray that our grandaughters can share these lessons with the entire congregation that will join them next year.